A New Beginning

I slowly discovering what really held me back in my past 14 years and Five months... All the while, I had been lying to myself and gave up so many opportunities to nurture myself =[ I will not blame my parents or anyone ! I blame myself for all this lawless deeds... I did not have any limitations at all ! Online gaming seemed to me as my daily routine ! Whatever the games are, it's still a form of virtual image ! Those usually procrastinates all my work !

I had been lazy and refused to accept people advice ! Yes, some went deep into my thoughts but mostly were ignored or not giving two hoots about it ! Books, movies or any other form of communication, shown or told me to be optimistic ! Hahas, some of which did exist in my daily life now ! Those mental strength and inner emotional control =]

Seriously, I did find it tough at the start but as it moves along the milestones I had embark... It gradually became enlighten =] EVERYTHING requires time and effort =] Minor or major not important as long as I BELIEVE I can, it will be =] In Jesus name =] Amen !

I have my dignity and pride for myself =] I vow today will be the mark of my journey to become a successful person in life =] Brilliant is it ? When you start praising yourself more, you feel the evil intensity automatically leave your soul =]

My point of view is that no matter whatever the problems or setbacks are, I should not have let it go ! As in give up =[ Nobody can help me including God if I don't help myself ! =] Mind is a powerful tool that can either generate disastrous and devastating results or benefiting and joyous results =] My mind is within my control =]

I am going to be from nobody to a somebody =] Nothing shall stop me or refrain me from achieving that ! I certainly worth more than any of you guys think ! I will not torture myself anymore ! I will love myself to the degree that I will surpass all my love for anyone I had in my life ! Simply, no one do not care if I live or die or suffer =]

This is my first fucking ever time, typing and meaning my words or text ! I am solemnly changing... It is unbearable and painful.... I can't watch my life pass by ! In the end, I gain nothing and I will appreciate nothing, absolutely zero !

I don't give a freaking damn thing anyone going to boast about ! Go ahead and crow ! I am too obstinate to believe that I am not far away from anyone ! I can make it ! =]

My past post are just illusions and imaginations I had ! =] A new Beginning will mark all my words ! =]

I will stop going online gaming ! I will find meaningful and productive work that will cause my mind to process ! =] I will start training myself, shift my emotions constantly in specific areas =] IF I had nothing good to say, I will just shut my fucking mouth up ! =] I promised !

All this things I pray in Jesus name. Amen! Hallelujah !









I end of with a BROAD SMILE =]